Missing...

I am missing my family. My east coast family. If it were not so expensive to fly home I so would.

I know I grew up here in California. But that is where my Dad longed to be. And that is where everyone was. We were alone here and when we would go on vacation everyone would be there. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, and my Grandparents. Not to mention that my Dad was truly happy there. I could tell that he felt like he was home and he felt at peace. That is why it is home to me.

Tony and I have made it a point to go back once a year, pretty much since we have been married. And this year, it is just not going to happen. And I am truly missing it right now.

I want to feel the warmth and welcomeness of Auntie Donna's home. With my goofy Uncle sitting in his chair smoking cigarettes. I want to see my cousin Lisa Marie and congratulate her on becoming an attourney!! I want to giggle at Timmy's foofy eyebrows. I want to see my Uncle Ernie try to hold the baby knowing damn well that she doesn't want him. I want to see my cousin Scotty smile while watching the kids play.

I crave sitting up in the fort. I want to be able to sit in Grampy's house without feeling sick, without missing my Gram so much that it hurts.

I want to laugh hysterically at my Aunt Sandy and give her a hug when she needs one. I want to go get tattooed or pierced or something bad with Angie.

There is nowhere else in the world where I would rather be right now, this very minute.